Comments on: annoying mother in law? who has one? VENT?

By: Kat G

Kat G — Tue, 22 Apr 2008 05:45:31 +0000

I would tell your in laws that if they have an issue with something your husband did to take it up with him as he is accountable for his actions. If it was me I would say nothing about the baby being born your husband can tell them after your home from the hospital and up for company.

Also hubby needs to go to the post office and have his mail forwarded from his mom’s house to your home. What is mailed by mistake she will not even see. This would be good for 1 year. As far as your bills go and what you owe or spend I would tell her that you do not need help with your finances or a budget and the topic is not up for discussion.

By: centreback16

centreback16 — Sat, 19 Apr 2008 10:24:57 +0000

Well, after 3.5 yrs of marriage, my husband has finally sold out his share in the family business, and we have moved interstate to get away from his crazy mother.
We have two very young children (1 & 3) and I am 6 mths pregnant with baby 3. We drew the line when she basically told me that I should only have 2 kids and should abort the third (no i am not making this up !!!) I have put up with incredible behaviour over the last few years, and Finally have made the decision that she is not welcome in my life, and she will never ever see my kids again….my husband can decide for himself what his relationship with her will be like, but for me….no way. I am not subjecting my children to someone who is clearly mentally unstable, and who refuses to accept any responsibility for her behaviour, and who purposefully sets about to cause trouble and drama for others. I feel so free that I can finally make that decision and know that it is the right one….after her comments on our third baby, my husband is right behind me.
Sometimes, we make allowances to keep the peace…..sometimes that “peace” becomes too painful.
Do all you can to not let your MIL interfere with the birth of your child - this is a most sacred and special time for you and your husband - my MIL intruded on the birth of both my first children, and caused countless stress throughout the pregnancies - No matter what, those memories will always surround what was otherwise the most joyous time of my life - don’t let this moment be defined by what your crazy MIL does….law down the law, and don’t let her come till you are good and ready.

Best of luck….it isn’t easy !!

By: doktorangbaliw

doktorangbaliw — Thu, 17 Apr 2008 20:06:36 +0000

My MIL is the sneaky kind. She comes off really sweet and nice at first, then you start to discover all her nasty habits. She hoards stuff so her house is a fire hazard! She depends on my husband and his sister (working as a nurse in the middle east) for financial support and when we suggest that she open a store or a small resto she violently refuses. My SIL won’t even talk to her when she calls long distance because all her mother tells her is that she needs to send more money. Oh, she also hoards the money my SIL gives her and makes my husband pay for stuff around her house. I am worried that she will siphon off needed finances from my baby when it comes (or get/demand money from me if I live there). My husband wants us to live with his mother to keep expenses down, but I don’t think I want to do that. She’s really nutty. She locks herself in her room for hours and no one knows what she’s up to. She snaps at my husband and my FIL. Thankfully she hasn’t started doing that to me since my husband says my profession intimidates her. LOL.

By: kdc

kdc — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 13:54:11 +0000

last christmas i went to check the mail and found a rather large parcel. i thought ‘ohh how nice, a christmas present for my daughter from the mother in law’. when i opened it i found a few books for my daughter and quite a few postcards. i thought she must have accidentally included her cards in the parcel to us. anyway, i opened one of the cards and she had actually written out cards to all my husbands friends, from my husband, with the postal stamp on the front and all. she had signed it from my husband and did not even include his wife or daughter. what the! all he had to do was post the cards. hmmmm…….

when i was pregnant with our daughter, the last trimester was filled with stress about the mother in law being at the hospital when i gave birth. she would continuously call the baby ‘my baby’ which was incredibly annoying because it is ‘MY baby’ not hers! if you know what i mean i gave strict instructions to my husband to not call his mother to tell her i was in labour or even when our daughter was born. she is so bloody pushy and has to know everything. she came to visit on day 2 for about 20 mins… long enough i reckon
the only fights we ever have are over her. i feel like i just can’t ‘escape’ her! she rings at the most inconvenient times, ie. on a friday night just after my daughter has gone to bed and we are just about to relax and have ‘our’ together time after a busy week. a few months ago we were watching a water polo match and sitting together and she was sitting in the row behind my husband and me and she was stroking his hair and face, ‘ohhhh look at his beautiful hair, isn’t it gorgeous’ to all the people around us. i felt most embarrassed. what is she thinking doing that infront of his wife. she can’t let go of her baby.

By: Angie29

Angie29 — Tue, 15 Apr 2008 01:42:22 +0000

I’ve been watching how my inlaws have reacted to their first grandkids through my husband’s brother. It’s been a learning experience, that’s for sure! Judging by what I’ve seen, I anticipate that they will try to be very, very, very involved and want to know everything about everything. They’re already bugging us about starting our family, which I hope I’ve nipped in the bud for a while. We try to stay respectful and keep some distance while being family. Call it being an artful dodger.

By: #2 coming July 18th

#2 coming July 18th — Mon, 14 Apr 2008 22:00:43 +0000

i love my in laws to death…however at times…my mother in law does tend to butt in…like you sometimes she gets stuff in the mail that belongs to my husband (we have been married and on our own for 8 years…i dont know why stuff is still going there) she opens the mail and she decides if its important or not. she does tell us what we should be spending money on and she is a really religious person and she judges the choices we make all of the time. they should not be causing stress on you right now..but you can be the bigger person and let them know when the baby comes. but just to warn you…it wont get easier because next up comes the judgement of your parenting skills….good luck!!!

By: sun day

sun day — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 16:05:13 +0000

I love my MIL but she drives me crazy also. She is VERY involved with everything in our lives and also calls my husband at least 2x a day. If he doesn’t answer, she calls over and over again. No kidding. She was awful trying to take over my wedding plans and she has done stuff that she should NEVER have said and done. I won’t even get into those details, smoke will start coming out of my ears. Anyway, even though she drives you crazy you can’t punish her by not calling her. She needs to be involved in your childs life. However, without bringing the baby into the situation talk to your husband about this and you both sit down with her and talk to her and law down the rules. You don’t want fighting to occur around your baby, s/he doesn’t need that drama. Good luck hope I helped.

By: Mother of 1 and due April 21st!

Mother of 1 and due April 21st! — Fri, 11 Apr 2008 08:05:48 +0000

It’s honestly YOUR decision. Your husband can say, oh baby please let my mother come to the hospital and see her grandchild. But ultimately YOUR having the child and can ban her from the maternity ward. I know how you feel, my mother in law doesn’t understand some of the things I do and say. Plus she still isn’t quite used to my husband and I being married. We went up this past Christmas to spend a week and half up in PA so my husband can spend time with his son. Well she criticized me the whole time we were there. About how I raise my son and how I need to discipline him more often. Well she knows that he has ADHD (5yrs old) and he is hard to deal with, plus we barely had things to do because she didn’t have cable or anything. She constantly gave my step-son this cottling behavior, and then would turn around and treat my son with such disrespect. My husband saw how she treated them differently, and when he tried mentioning it to her; she just went up to her room and didn’t want to deal with it. She’s a nice woman and I’ve known her for a very long time, but she’s changed since she got married to her current husband. And currently takes out her frustrations out on everything and everyone. But her grandson, even though my son isn’t her biological grandson she treats him like dirt. And I want us all to be a family, but how can I when she acts like she barely cares?

By: star751960

star751960 — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 10:13:12 +0000

Sounds like you have your hands full and yes there are other crazy mother in laws out there. She sounds really controlling and maybe even mental. sis in law don’t sound any better. The bad thing is your stuck with them. I think one of you needs to put your foot down. They have no right to treat you like childrenand you should say so.

By: Jesk

Jesk — Wed, 09 Apr 2008 00:32:15 +0000

Wow, your mother-in-law sounds like she has a real chip on her shoulder.
My mother-in-law was actually pretty good and before i left I could get a lot more sense out of her then my (ex)wife